AINTREE IS PROUD TO OPEN “BLACKMORE’S BAR”

…if I had a position of note in the alcoholic drinks industry, I would spend my advertising budget taking out an injunction and challenging the legality of calling a non-alcoholic venue a “BAR”.

This is oxymoronic, though not as extreme as a Cheese and Onion Pasty, which is just moronic.

Rachael, darling of a generation of impressionable punters and (unusually for an icon) deserving of the admiration, has dropped her stick here.

What next? The “Pilgarlic Bar”, after a serially placed plodder, that doesn’t close until the last drinker has finished his last pint; or worse still the “Mad Moose Bar”, that only opens one day in three and doesn’t advertise which one that will be?

Possibly the “Keith Brown Bar”, which opens its doors, but then clears the bar and makes everyone queue up a second time, before putting the towels on the pumps.

JP McManus, so fond of scriptio continua is unlikely to reach for Standingroomonly to commemorate this establishment.